Saturday, September 20, 2014

My mind needs to calm it's butt down.

I would like to say that anxiety attacks are one of the worst things on the existence of this planet.

I've never experienced them until recently. I don't even think mine are that bad compared to some people, but I feel like someone is shaking all the nerves in my body causing me to tense up. The worst part of it is the fact that I feel like I can't breathe. 

This first time I had an anxiety attack was last week and my father called the paramedics because he was afraid I wasn't getting enough oxygen. Quite the contrary, I was breathing too fast and getting too much oxygen. Which was causing my fingers to tingle and for me to be extremely light headed. Apparently when you get too much oxygen, you can hit the floor too. 

Ever since then, I've been getting hits of anxiety attacks. My body has literally cracked and can't handle anymore stress. It's to the point were my body has decided to make even irrational things into big things. 

Tyler went to Halloween Horror Nights with his friends tonight. I hadn't seen any social media updates from him or his friends the whole night. So when I woke up around 1:30am and checked my phone and saw there had been no updates, but body went haywire. I even kept telling myself, they are busy. They are still at the park. 

My mind didn't seem to care and came to the conclusion that everyone had died in car accident of some sort. 

Anxiety attack.

A very irrational one. Luckily, I have a friend who not only stays up to the wee hours of the morning, but also suffers from anxiety attacks. I texted her and she helped me out. Even when Tyler texted me 30 minutes later that he had left the park, my body refused to calm down. 

Now I'm here ranting about anxiety. 

I think if these appearance of attacks aren't a sign that my body is very overwhelmed, I don't know what is. 

Little body, I'm trying to take care of you. Please be patient with me. 

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